Do Schools Want to Crank Out Little Monochromatic Robots?

Published on November 9, 2005 By Texas Wahine In Misc

My children's school has no dress code. That's right. None.

We see short skirts, little boys with earrings, mohawk hair cuts, band t-shirts, slippers (flip-flops), knee high boots, colored hair...you name it. It's very lax for an elementary school.

I can remember the dress code for my old high school. For several years we weren't allowed to wear shorts. Later sweat pants were outlawed (to be fair, this was because we were naughty children and anyone who wore sweat pants was pantsed). Sleeveless shirts were out for a while. The guys' hair could not fall past the collar of their shirts. Any t-shirt with words or graphics on it was subject to intense scrutiny (unless it said "Jesus" on it). Guys were absolutely not allowed to wear earrings.

When I was a Junior in high school I dyed my hair purple. Only two streaks were dyed because my parents weren't sure how the school administration would react. They tried to pull the "no unnatural hair colors" card on me, but it wasn't anywhere in the rules.

As a frustrated teen, tweaking my personal appearance was a satisfying outlet for me to express individuality.

When the trend was knee high socks and Mary-Janes, I felt comfortable in Doc Marten style boots, jeans, and a Kurt Cobain t-shirt.

I love that my children's school allows the kids to have the freedom to dress themselves in the way that makes them feel confident and comfortable. Oversight is the responsibility of the parents. Children don't have a say in much of the things in their lives that affect them, and I think that clothing and other appearance choices empower children and allow them to practice making choices without risking lasting harm.

All that freedom at my kids' school will soon be ending. Today I received a Dress Code Survey.

The survey offered three options in regards to clothing and three more for footwear and the instructions given were to discuss the choices with the children and then indicate my (parent) choice and their (children) choice.

For clothing the choice is a) conservative dress code (no midriffs, wide-strapped sleeveless tops, mid-thigh on pants/shorts/skirts),

school t-shirts in either one color for everyone or a choice of 4-5 colors, or c) school t-shirts in a single color per grade.

The conservative dress code is fine with me. I don't think it's too harsh. It enforces modesty, but that's not a bad thing. I really hope that other parents are like-minded, because I think the school t-shirt idea is sad.

For footwear the choice is a) closed toe/closed heel shoes only,

allow open toe shoes and sandals only if they have a heel or ankle strap, or c) allow any and all footwear to be worn.

The footwear might not seem like a big deal, but this is freaking Hawaii. Kids wear slippers. Adults wear slippers. We wear them to the park, to the store, to church, to funerals, to the movies, to school...everywhere. It's as much a part of the local culture as Zippys or Chinaman's hat. It's comfortable, it's convenient, and it's cheap.

Slippers can be bought for $2 and they last for a year or longer. The kids come home with grimy little red toes from running in the dirt with their slippers on. I love that. In the mornings, they grab their slippers from the porch by the front door and slip them on and we're good to go. Perhaps I'm being more sentimental than practical, but sneakers just don't seem right.

We'll see what gets approved. This is a pet project being put together by the newly created student council, and I applaud the children for working to shape the type of school environment that they want and for soliciting parent opinion, but I sincerely hope that the school uniform plan won't be implemented.

I want my children to be able to express themselves. They spend so much time complying and being told what to do. The least we can do is allow them to choose between the Darth Vader t-shirt and the Honu tank top.

Comments (Page 2)

Gideon MacLeish

on Nov 10, 2005

Dress code is one thing, uniforms another. I'm quite frightened by the socialist undertones of a rigid uniform policy.

But mebbe that's just because I was raised during the climax of the Cold War (shrug!)

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

I have got to run (Adrian's off and we're going to go put the kids' Christmas on layaway...yay!), but I'll be back later to reply to all the comments. Thanks for your input guys.

jennybean

on Nov 10, 2005

I can see how dramatic a new dress code might be for a school in Hawaii, considering how laid back I would imagine it to be. I went to Hawaii on my honeymoon just 1.5 years ago, and while driving once we passed a school while the kids were at recess. They obviously had a dress code because all of the kids matched in purple tee shirts and jeans, which I thought a little strange for some reason. If it is so casual, why bother with a dress code at all?
A little of the topic, what island do you live on? Since I am fairly new on JoeUser, I always wonder when I see your name. I am obssessed with Hawaii ever since I went, and can't imagine how awesome it would be to actually live there. Just curious

dynamaso

on Nov 10, 2005

Allowing a child to choose his or her clothing is a safe (meaning the problems caused by a poor choice are not going to have a major impact on the child's life) way to allow them to learn about consequences

I also have a problem with the fact that uniforms don't provide the cild with a sense of individuality, which is an important characteristic for a young person to learn and respect in others.

dynamaso

on Nov 10, 2005

I also have a problem with the fact that uniforms don't provide the cild with a sense of individuality, which is an important characteristic for a young person to learn and respect in others as well as develop in themselves.

Dr Guy

on Nov 10, 2005

also have a problem with the fact that uniforms don't provide the cild with a sense of individuality, which is an important characteristic for a young person to learn and respect in others as well as develop in themselves.

I see your hiccup, and raise you an Amen!

(Double post, but being poor growing up, and handmedowns, I never minded).

Tova7

on Nov 10, 2005

When we visited Hawaii last year we thought it was so cute how the kids at the elementary school were outside playing barefoot.....our Hawaiian "cousin" told us that shoes weren't a requirement....

I hope you all get to keep the more relaxed dress code. It seems a bit much for the island to have "dress" for school.

Just my opinion.

PlausibleDeniability

on Nov 10, 2005

Hey Tex, In answer to your initial question, yes, in more ways than one.

Great article, and lots of good insight from you and others!

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

InBloom:

Where I work, we have a uniform policy. Students can only wear school shirts (t-shirt or polo shirts) with the school logo, and slacks or khaki pants. Pants cannot be baggy, and belts must be worn at all times. This was not something the district mandated out of thin air;
Parents actually had a say, and voted FOR the uniforms. The support mostly had to do with money, with parents expressing that a small set of uniform clothing would be much less expensive than buying regular clothes for them year round.

I can understand that being helpful for some parents, but in this situation, the suggested uniform is school t-shirts, bought from the school. These things are around $15. My kids will need at minimum 5 a piece per semester. That's $300 a year, without consideration for pants and other clothing that I'll need to buy.

That's more expensive for me than normal school clothes spending.

However, if you look at the whole picture, a kid will still be very much an individual, dress code or not...their personalities and quirks and ways of being aren't going to disappear just because they have to conform to a dress code...it is a superficial thing they can probably overcome in time.

This is true, however, it may encourage more outrageous appearances from the kids, which makes the uniforms counterproductive.

stutefish:

I'm all for people being empowered and expressing their individuality... AFTER they've fully internalized all of the responsibilities and obligations that living in community with other people entail.

Haha. So my 5 year old should have to understand his obligations and responsibilities to the community (like what? Hahaha) before he can be trusted or allowed to choose between a red Power Rangers t-shirt and a blue polo shirt?

That is, "children" should be taught responsibility first. Exercising individual power is for adults who have learned how to use it responsibly.

I disagree. Children learn by doing. If all their decisions are made for them, their growth in regards to responsibility is stunted.

Show me that you understand the value of rules, and that you have learned the self-discipline necessary to obey the rules, and that you are capable of this self-discipline consistently in your daily life. Then we'll talk about driving cars, drinking heavily, procreating.

We're talking about little ones here. Elementary school kids...and their ability to choose what color or style of torso covering they are going to wear. This isn't anything monumental. It's just a small way to teach them about personal choices and consequences without allowing them to harm themselves.

Yes to school uniforms, no to kids treating school like a fashion runway.

Fashion runway? Haha. My children couldn't care less about fashion. They know what clothes are comfortable and which ones have the colors or designs they like on them. I don't see how allowing them to wear what pleases them constitutes forsaking learning for fashion.

dharma:

Kids at that age are very limited in how they can express themselves, and personal appearance is one of the few things they can have control over. If they want a adopt a clothing code then that's fine....but telling kids they can't have a mohawk or purple streaks in their hair? Nah. That's too far.

I agree completely. I have no problem with a dress code that is implemented with the children's safety in mind. However, allowing children to dress themselves and care for their personal appearance is an excellent way to foster independence, creativity, and good decision-making skills.

For the record.....the same kid that wanted blue hair won't even consider a mohawk or any 'unnatural' colors now. He's got his high and tight, and he's happy with that. I'd have LOVED it if he'd have said yes, I could have re-lived my punk roots through my child. *sigh* I have hope that Shea (who is heavily into Green Day and The Ramones at the moment) will want to do something unusual with her hair or will see the style statement that Doc Martens make....

Haha. I know what you mean. I have to bite my tongue often, because I have a tendency to encourage things that I like. Hehe. It's fascinating watching them grow, though, and show you the unique little people they are inside.

ParaTed:

Also, some areas have had to turn to uniforms because of gang violence. In a day when gangs unilaterally decide that their members are the only ones who can wear Red, or Green Bay Packers gear, well, you can see what problems that can lead to. In fact, you may have already experienced it.

I understand that, and when it's a safety issue, I support school uniforms. However, in our little elementary school on our little military base, that's not even remotely an issue.

Even the military, with its extremely rigid dress code doesn't even come close to creating "Little Monochromatic Robots... no matter what many would want us to believe. As you well know.

I think there's a difference there, though. The military must operate as a disciplined, cohesive unit. The uniform, in addition to its many other functions, enforces that idea.

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

Dr.Guy:

So when the Streaking craze hit, no one was suspended for violating the dress code!

Hahahahahaa. Got off on a technicality, huh? Hehe.

InBloom:

Do you know what also played a part ? The fact that a "poor" child would not stand out if he/she wore the same uniform as a "better off child"...eliminating the risk of poor kids being ridiculed and taunted because they are not as well-dressed or as in "fashion" as their peers.

My children go to a school where about 99% of the kids are military children. While there are Officer's children and lower enlisted all in class together, the "poor" thing isn't much of an issue. Pretty much all the children have everything they need. There are few, if any, children who stick out as "poor".

Further, the culture here is far less uptight about things like that. Brand names don't mean much here. It's pretty refreshing, actually.

I don't know about trying to make everything fair, either. I don't think it sends a good message to our kids when we try to paint a picture of the world as being fair and friendly. It's not, and sometimes others will have advantages over us. We have to prepare our children for that.

xtine:

It takes away that little bit of distraction that for some kids is a HUGE deal and allows school to focus more on what school is for: ACADEMICS!

This goes with what I replied to InBloom above. It's not really an issue here, and even if it were, I'm not so sure that I support the idea of blinding our children to the things they will deal with as adults.

I'm also not sure how allowing a child to dress himself would distract from his ability to learn and concentrate. Perhaps in the higher grades this is more of a problem, but it's not an issue for my little ones.

DJBandit:

The truth is I’m also OK with them expressing their individuality, but something like a clean uniforms makes them look more organized. We have to keep in mind that school is only for a small part of the day and that there is plenty of time after school and weekends for kids, teens and adults to express themselves in any shape or form they choose. School is for education, not to show off you fall fashion.

I'm not sure why so many posters seem to think that allowing a child to reach into his dresser and pick the shirt he's going to wear that date equates some bloated obsession with fashion and disregard for education.

We're not talking about wealthy elite teens and Gucci here...it's little military brats and Garanimals.

Sure, the children can pick what they wear when they come home from school. And I can wash double the laundry. Win-win, eh? The message this sends to kids is that they can't even be trusted to dress themselves. Ugh.

5. In the end the parent should be more concerned with their child’s education and not what they wear to school. If you child’s fashion statement is very important to you, that’s why there is after school time and weekends. Like I said before school is for education not for fashion. Responsibility before individuality.

I will concern myself with EVERY aspect of my child's life. This is one of them. The condescending scolding is not necessary.

Tova7

on Nov 10, 2005

I wonder what the catalyst for this proposal was? Were some parents complaining? Is this a state thing, or a district thing?

I don't really have an opinion one way or another about them. My boys couldn't care less what they wear. Heck my ten year old fights with me when its time to go school shopping, and wants to know why I can't just do it on my own.

Shesh....in a few years he won't trust me to do that I bet!

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

Dynosoar:

Congrats on the feature !

Thanks.

It was a pleasant surprise!

1. Children might as well be prepared for "the real world", where appropriate dress is required, isn't school their "job"?

Like you, I look at school as being my children's job, but in the real world, you are generally able to make decisions about your personal appearance within the confines of the rules of your working environment.

For some people that may mean khakis and a logo polo every day and for others anything goes except sweat pants. With few exceptions, adults are still granted control over their personal appearance.

2. The haves v/s the have nots is a valid argument, keeping up with fashions is unnessasary peer pressure.

I don't feel like this is a relevant argument in our particular situation.

3. My experience with two kids in Catholic School was uniforms were CHEAPER than seasonal fashions.

Again, in this specific situation, the school t-shirts are likely going to raise the costs of dressing our children. And the school stands to make quite a bit of money from the shirts.

4. Extremes in fashion are disruptive( i.e. revealing), divisive( i.e., expensive), and sometimes threatening ( i.e., gang regalia). By removing the distractions education becomes the focus.

I have no problem with a dress code that sets practical limitations because of safety or distraction concerns. I think in our situation uniforms push it too far.

5. Uniforms provide a security measure in identifing non-students or non-faculty.

This is a good point, but not a pressing concern for my children's school.

6.. Our children are just that, our children. We are responsible to insure that they learn to be responsible adults, not pre-pubesent fashionistas, a facsimile of the latest Rap star, or Grunge wannabe.

Part of learning to be an adult is being responsible for yourself. Dressing himself is one of the most basic ways a child can learn this.

So it Goes........

Thanks for your comment. I especially appreciated the numbered bulleting. Very organized.

Gideon:

It is NOW. So YOU'RE the one to blame for that one! LOL

HAHAHAHAHAAHA...I started it, but I didn't finish it. By the time my brother was in high school my parents had loosened up, and he was sporting full on electric blue hair over his entire head. He also painted his finger nails black. Drove the school admin crazy.

Dress code is one thing, uniforms another. I'm quite frightened by the socialist undertones of a rigid uniform policy.
But mebbe that's just because I was raised during the climax of the Cold War (shrug!)

I agree completely. A dress code implemented with safety and learning in mind is fine with me. I really don't like the idea of uniforms. The aren't necessary here.

In fact, Adrian has suggested that the reason they're pushing for it is because they want to make a buck. Perhaps...

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

jennybean:

I can see how dramatic a new dress code might be for a school in Hawaii, considering how laid back I would imagine it to be.

Things ARE very laid back here. Ever heard "I'm not late, I'm on Hawaii time"? Hehe. Uniforms just seem unnecessary.

A little of the topic, what island do you live on? Since I am fairly new on JoeUser, I always wonder when I see your name. I am obsessed with Hawaii ever since I went, and can't imagine how awesome it would be to actually live there. Just curious

We live on Oahu, and it has been very exciting living here. I feel sorry for the people who visit because there's just no way to experience it all in a span of one or two weeks.

Which islands did you visit? We haven't been to any others yet, but I am seriously yearning to visit the Big Island.

Maso:

I agree 100%, Maso. While it's important for children to learn to respect authority and conduct themselves appropriately according to their surroundings and situation, it is equally important that children learn to develop their own interests and identify and work with their individual strengths and weaknesses.

And I don't want to underestimate the value of creativity, which is something that must be nurtured but cannot be taught.

You also bring up a good point about respect. Allowing children to look different helps them learn tolerance and respect for themselves and others.

Thanks for the insightful reply.

Dr.Guy:

I see your hiccup, and raise you an Amen!

Tova:

When we visited Hawaii last year we thought it was so cute how the kids at the elementary school were outside playing barefoot.....our Hawaiian "cousin" told us that shoes weren't a requirement....

Haha. It's bizarre and takes some getting used to...there are many stores where the "shirt and shoes" thing isn't a requirement. There are many places where things are extremely casual and natural.

I hope you all get to keep the more relaxed dress code. It seems a bit much for the island to have "dress" for school.

Thanks, me too.

Sarah:

Hey Tex, In answer to your initial question, yes, in more ways than one.

Haha. Sometimes I wonder!

Great article, and lots of good insight from you and others!

Thanks!

Tova:

I wonder what the catalyst for this proposal was? Were some parents complaining? Is this a state thing, or a district thing?

I have been wondering that myself. Our school is kind of weird in that while it's on a military base, it's not a DOD school. We do things differently from most of the schools on the island, though, and are one of the very few that still use the traditional calendar.

As far as I know, this proposal is coming from the student council...a new creation...and being guided by faculty and parents.

I don't really have an opinion one way or another about them. My boys couldn't care less what they wear. Heck my ten year old fights with me when its time to go school shopping, and wants to know why I can't just do it on my own.

I think my boys would like it at first...the novelty of it...but eventually they'll grow tired of having to wear the same thing every day.

Shesh....in a few years he won't trust me to do that I bet!

Haha. I'll bet you're right! I let my boys guide me when I buy their clothes, but they aren't all that interested. Once the clothes make it home, though, they have their favorites and things that they don't really like to wear.

I exercise oversight on the weekdays and on the weekends they wear whatever the hell they want, no matter how nutty, mis-matched, or ill-fitting! Hehe.

jennybean

on Nov 11, 2005

"Which islands did you visit? We haven't been to any others yet, but I am seriously yearning to visit the Big Island."

We went to Kauai, and are actually returning to visit again in March. I am counting down the days already!!!! It is incredibly beautiful and natural there. No tall buildings or hotels like on the other islands, which is what we like.

I also would like to visit Oahu and the Big Island, too.

DJBandit

on Nov 11, 2005

I'm not sure why so many posters seem to think that allowing a child to reach into his dresser and pick the shirt he's going to wear that date equates some bloated obsession with fashion and disregard for education.We're not talking about wealthy elite teens and Gucci here...it's little military brats and Garanimals. Sure, the children can pick what they wear when they come home from school. And I can wash double the laundry. Win-win, eh? The message this sends to kids is that they can't even be trusted to dress themselves. Ugh.

No actually the messege this sends is that parents are the ones that can't be trusted. The way I see it an elementary child is not the one who buys the clothing, their parents do. If anyone is to blame for dress codes it the parents for not teaching their children how to properly dress when buying them the skimp skirts and provocatives tops. Like you, my concern is not my childs clothing, its everyone elses and I'm sure most will agree.

I will concern myself with EVERY aspect of my child's life. This is one of them. The condescending scolding is not necessary.

You people really do take things very literally here. It's almost as if I offended you with my opinion. BTW it's just my opinion and not an attack to you in specific.

3. My experience with two kids in Catholic School was uniforms were CHEAPER than seasonal fashions

.Again, in this specific situation, the school t-shirts are likely going to raise the costs of dressing our children. And the school stands to make quite a bit of money from the shirts.

Hold on, raise cost? Why? Don't you already spend money so that your kids have clothes to wear to school? So now you don't have to buy that clothes for school instead you buy the school T-Shirts. And since when is it a bad thing for the school to make money, wouldn't that also help the school give a better education and wouldn't that mean that the parenst contributed to that education as well? It seems to me that money seems to be the main concern here.

I have no problem with a dress code that sets practical limitations because of safety or distraction concerns. I think in our situation uniforms push it too far.

Perhaps you're making more of a big deal than it really is.

This is a good point, but not a pressing concern for my children's school.

So it's only important to address safety only when danger is more present? All this just so you child can look better and feel good about how he looks?

Part of learning to be an adult is being responsible for yourself. Dressing himself is one of the most basic ways a child can learn this.

A child never really dresses him or herself cause we, the parents buy the clothes and we also chose whether to allow them to wear what they pick or not. I would doubt that if your child chose to wear only his underwear to school that you would not allow him to do so just because he feels its more confy?

In fact, Adrian has suggested that the reason they're pushing for it is because they want to make a buck. Perhaps...

It is possible, but as parents you should make sure that money is put to good use and not spent on something like an expresso coffee machine in the teachers lounge for example.

Things ARE very laid back here. Ever heard "I'm not late, I'm on Hawaii time"? Hehe. Uniforms just seem unnecessary.

Keep in mind that your lifestyle is very different to many whos opinions, like mine, are opposite to yours. We all have more or less the same ideal in mind. Our childrens education. Life here in Puerto Rico ( this is also an Island and a Tropical one) and in Miami, where I use to live, are not laid back like Hawaii and so our opinions will be very different from time to time. I believe what you mean is uniforms are unnecesary for the lifestyle where you live at which may be true. I don't know, never been there, I'll take your word for it.

I hope you all get to keep the more relaxed dress code. It seems a bit much for the island to have "dress" for school.

I do as well.

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