Do Schools Want to Crank Out Little Monochromatic Robots?

Published on November 9, 2005 By Texas Wahine In Misc

My children's school has no dress code. That's right. None.

We see short skirts, little boys with earrings, mohawk hair cuts, band t-shirts, slippers (flip-flops), knee high boots, colored hair...you name it. It's very lax for an elementary school.

I can remember the dress code for my old high school. For several years we weren't allowed to wear shorts. Later sweat pants were outlawed (to be fair, this was because we were naughty children and anyone who wore sweat pants was pantsed). Sleeveless shirts were out for a while. The guys' hair could not fall past the collar of their shirts. Any t-shirt with words or graphics on it was subject to intense scrutiny (unless it said "Jesus" on it). Guys were absolutely not allowed to wear earrings.

When I was a Junior in high school I dyed my hair purple. Only two streaks were dyed because my parents weren't sure how the school administration would react. They tried to pull the "no unnatural hair colors" card on me, but it wasn't anywhere in the rules.

As a frustrated teen, tweaking my personal appearance was a satisfying outlet for me to express individuality.

When the trend was knee high socks and Mary-Janes, I felt comfortable in Doc Marten style boots, jeans, and a Kurt Cobain t-shirt.

I love that my children's school allows the kids to have the freedom to dress themselves in the way that makes them feel confident and comfortable. Oversight is the responsibility of the parents. Children don't have a say in much of the things in their lives that affect them, and I think that clothing and other appearance choices empower children and allow them to practice making choices without risking lasting harm.

All that freedom at my kids' school will soon be ending. Today I received a Dress Code Survey.

The survey offered three options in regards to clothing and three more for footwear and the instructions given were to discuss the choices with the children and then indicate my (parent) choice and their (children) choice.

For clothing the choice is a) conservative dress code (no midriffs, wide-strapped sleeveless tops, mid-thigh on pants/shorts/skirts),

school t-shirts in either one color for everyone or a choice of 4-5 colors, or c) school t-shirts in a single color per grade.

The conservative dress code is fine with me. I don't think it's too harsh. It enforces modesty, but that's not a bad thing. I really hope that other parents are like-minded, because I think the school t-shirt idea is sad.

For footwear the choice is a) closed toe/closed heel shoes only,

allow open toe shoes and sandals only if they have a heel or ankle strap, or c) allow any and all footwear to be worn.

The footwear might not seem like a big deal, but this is freaking Hawaii. Kids wear slippers. Adults wear slippers. We wear them to the park, to the store, to church, to funerals, to the movies, to school...everywhere. It's as much a part of the local culture as Zippys or Chinaman's hat. It's comfortable, it's convenient, and it's cheap.

Slippers can be bought for $2 and they last for a year or longer. The kids come home with grimy little red toes from running in the dirt with their slippers on. I love that. In the mornings, they grab their slippers from the porch by the front door and slip them on and we're good to go. Perhaps I'm being more sentimental than practical, but sneakers just don't seem right.

We'll see what gets approved. This is a pet project being put together by the newly created student council, and I applaud the children for working to shape the type of school environment that they want and for soliciting parent opinion, but I sincerely hope that the school uniform plan won't be implemented.

I want my children to be able to express themselves. They spend so much time complying and being told what to do. The least we can do is allow them to choose between the Darth Vader t-shirt and the Honu tank top.

Comments (Page 1)

singrdave

on Nov 09, 2005

Our school in Maryland has no dress code, and that suits us and the kids just fine. We resented having to buy two sets of clothes every school year: one for school and one for home. It got expensive!

dynamaso

on Nov 09, 2005

I went to a school with the strictest dress code: black leather lace up shoes, navy blue pants, grey shirt and a school tie. Having to wear a tie, particularly in the summer months here, is ludicrous and archaic at best. I can't begin to tell you what I would have given to be able to wear what I wanted.

Let the kids have their choice. As you said, it is a great way to empower them and help express their individuality.

InBloom

on Nov 09, 2005

~I think that clothing and other appearance choices empower children and allow them to practice making choices without risking lasting harm.~

Where I work, we have a uniform policy. Students can only wear school shirts (t-shirt or polo shirts) with the school logo, and slacks or khaki pants. Pants cannot be baggy, and belts must be worn at all times. This was not something the district mandated out of thin air;
Parents actually had a say, and voted FOR the uniforms. The support mostly had to do with money, with parents expressing that a small set of uniform clothing would be much less expensive than buying regular clothes for them year round.

~~I want my children to be able to express themselves. They spend so much time complying and being told what to do. The least we can do is allow them to choose between the Darth Vader t-shirt and the Honu tank top.~~

Honestly, regular clothing at school wouldn't bother me...I think it should be monitored more with older kids (since they are at that age where they have a tendency to rebel and challenge authority). However, if you look at the whole picture, a kid will still be very much an individual, dress code or not...their personalities and quirks and ways of being aren't going to disappear just because they have to conform to a dress code...it is a superficial thing they can probably overcome in time.

stutefish

on Nov 09, 2005

I'm all for people being empowered and expressing their individuality... AFTER they've fully internalized all of the responsibilities and obligations that living in community with other people entail.

That is, "children" should be taught responsibility first. Exercising individual power is for adults who have learned how to use it responsibly.

Show me that you understand the value of rules, and that you have learned the self-discipline necessary to obey the rules, and that you are capable of this self-discipline consistently in your daily life. Then we'll talk about driving cars, drinking heavily, procreating.

Yes to school uniforms, no to kids treating school like a fashion runway.

dharmagrl

on Nov 09, 2005

We had a strict uniform policy when I was a kid. Girls HAD to wear skirts between the months of February and November. We weren't allowed to wear pants. We had to have navy blue skirts, navy sweaters or cardigans, and white or light blue shirts. The boys had to wear ties. It even permeated our PE wear...the girls couldn't wear shorts, we had to wear PE skirts (think short mini skirt) and we had to wear navy blue knickers on top of your regular knickers underneath that.

Whilst I agree that there should be some guidelines (no belly shirts, and no skirts or shorts shorter than mid thigh) I think that extending it too much cramps blossoming little personal styles. Kids at that age are very limited in how they can express themselves, and personal appearance is one of the few things they can have control over. If they want a adopt a clothing code then that's fine....but telling kids they can't have a mohawk or purple streaks in their hair? Nah. That's too far.

My son went to school with blue hair a few times. It was only a spray that could be washed out, but if he had said that he wanted it to be permanent I'd do it for him. I'm all about expressing individuality, and if a kid feels that having purple hair is the way they want to do that...then more power to them. I got a call from the principal asking if I was aware than he had blue hair, and she seemed surprised when i said that I was the one who had bought and applied the color for him.

For the record.....the same kid that wanted blue hair won't even consider a mohawk or any 'unnatural' colors now. He's got his high and tight, and he's happy with that. I'd have LOVED it if he'd have said yes, I could have re-lived my punk roots through my child. *sigh* I have hope that Shea (who is heavily into Green Day and The Ramones at the moment) will want to do something unusual with her hair or will see the style statement that Doc Martens make....

ParaTed2k

on Nov 10, 2005

I used to be dead set against school uniforms, but then I noticed something. Even if left to ourselves, we humans pretty much stick to the uniforms of our peers. We also expect others to act and live in accordance with the uniform we choose for ourselves. There is an attitude that goes with how we dress and what we wear. Not only an attitude from ourselves, but an attitude from others.

The first priority of any school policy should always be the education of students. Any dress code or uniform policy should keep that first and foremost in mind. Now, that is not to say that every boy has to wear a white shirt and tie, or every girl should have to wear skirts. In fact, I believe that too confining a dress code goes against a good learning environment as too loose a dress code. On the other hand, when kids are spending more time concerned with expressing themselves than they are actually learning, the whole point of school is lost.

Also, some areas have had to turn to uniforms because of gang violence. In a day when gangs unilaterally decide that their members are the only ones who can wear Red, or Green Bay Packers gear, well, you can see what problems that can lead to. In fact, you may have already experienced it.

So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm really mixed on the whole subject. My kids school has a dress code, but Pam and I would never allow our kids to wear some of the things we see being worn my their classmates. On the other hand, if any of my kids decided to die their hair some strange color, I doubt it would bother me much. Unless we noticed an attitude problem going with it.

Even the military, with its extremely rigid dress code doesn't even come close to creating "Little Monochromatic Robots... no matter what many would want us to believe. As you well know. ;~D

Dr Guy

on Nov 10, 2005

I went to high school in the 70s. So our dress code was VERY liberal. Basically was that you had to wear shoes (not specified on the type) on your feet. Period! (of Course this was before 4 letter words became the norm on t-shirts).

So when the Streaking craze hit, no one was suspended for violating the dress code!

InBloom

on Nov 10, 2005

~Also, some areas have had to turn to uniforms because of gang violence~

Yes, this played a part in the decision to turn to uniforms in our area (with the primary reason being economic). Do you know what also played a part ? The fact that a "poor" child would not stand out if he/she wore the same uniform as a "better off child"...eliminating the risk of poor kids being ridiculed and taunted because they are not as well-dressed or as in "fashion" as their peers.

InBloom

on Nov 10, 2005

double post

xtine

on Nov 10, 2005

I think my opinion is a little biased as I grew up in a family that couldn't afford the "right" clothes to ensure my acceptance in the environment where we lived. And kids are cruel. So with that bit of background plus a little bit of adult thought, I support school uniforms. It takes away that little bit of distraction that for some kids is a HUGE deal and allows school to focus more on what school is for: ACADEMICS!

School should not be a fashion show. Let's get back to readin', writin', and 'rithmetic.

DJBandit

on Nov 10, 2005

Here in Puerto Rico they have dress codes. Every school has its colors, at times there were rules on how high the skirt could be but it seems that that one was lost in the politics. Puerto Rico is a really political country, everything his is based on politics. The biggest problem I see with uniforms here is that the girls usually have their uniforms made by a tailor, or in this case a person who knows how to cut fabric and then sew it together to make what looks like a uniform. I say what looks like because they don’t come close to the quality of the ones sold in Walmart and we all know Walmart’s quality in clothing (I think).

The sad part is that chances are you child school will most likely go for the uniforms. I have notices that thru South Florida, where my wife and her family are from, schools are beginning to add the uniform dress code. I personally don’t see anything wrong with uniforms.

The truth is I’m also OK with them expressing their individuality, but something like a clean uniforms makes them look more organized. We have to keep in mind that school is only for a small part of the day and that there is plenty of time after school and weekends for kids, teens and adults to express themselves in any shape or form they choose. School is for education, not to show off you fall fashion.

So here is my stance:

1. Education is first. If in any way either one of the ideas hurts my child’s education it’s a bad thing for me.

2. I’m OK with not have a uniform dress code as long as the regular clothes they wear is not too provocative (very short skirts, very short shorts) or too gangster like (huge jackets on hot days, pants showing their underwear, couldn’t find a better word to say it so I used gangster like).

3. I’m also OK if a uniform dress code is used. Gives the school a more professional look. It’s much easier to get them dressed in the morning when you already know ahead of time what they going to wear.

4. Shoes are not much of a concern to me, it’s all about what clothes they are wearing and so the shoes should fit the style.

5. In the end the parent should be more concerned with their child’s education and not what they wear to school. If you child’s fashion statement is very important to you, that’s why there is after school time and weekends. Like I said before school is for education not for fashion. Responsibility before individuality.

I do have one advice for many who are parents and those who might be sooner or later. Sometimes it’s Ok to let children express themselves in the ways they would like to like coloring their hair, using black lipstick, listening to heavy metal and even wear earrings in places like their tongs and face. Other body parts I don’t agree cause the reason to wear them is to show them and some places should not be shown just for the hell of it. Allowing them to express themselves in ways that don’t seem too harmful for themselves gives them a sense of trust from their parents and will most likely teach them to be better people in the future. I worked with me and some parents here have also said the same. Give your kids a chance; holding them back only gives them more reasons to want to defy us more. Obviously there are things one should not allow, like drugs, where one uses education and, sometimes, tough love and hope they understand.

Just my 2 cents.

Man, I just can't write short replies can I?

Ziggystyles

on Nov 10, 2005

I agree in that students should be able to choose and dress how they like. I have no problem with most of the stuff worn today but I do agree with the conservative dress code. It still allows a great deal of flexibility and students can still wear mostly what they want outside of revealing clothes and shirts that others might be offended by.

I think that students should have to wear regular shoes to school. I dont know all the reasons behind districts wanting to do this...but from my perspective as a teacher, its a safety issue. Students drop stuff all the time, either themselves or someone around them and if they are wearing slippers, I think they are more likely to get injured. Of course, the reasons behind the closed shoes might be the same reasons behind the wide strapped tops.

I think that uniforms can be a plus in some situations. For every student and parent that doenst like them, there is one that does like them. There are many instances of where they have been inforced and they work well. Im half and half on the issue.

Dynosoar

on Nov 10, 2005

Hi Tex,
Congrats on the feature !

As to the topic of School Dress Codes;

1. Children might as well be prepared for "the real world", where appropriate dress is required, isn't school their "job"?

2. The haves v/s the have nots is a valid argument, keeping up with fashions is unnessasary peer pressure.

3. My experience with two kids in Catholic School was uniforms were CHEAPER than seasonal fashions.

4. Extremes in fashion are disruptive( i.e. revealing), divisive( i.e., expensive), and sometimes threatening ( i.e., gang regalia). By removing the distractions education becomes the focus.

5. Uniforms provide a security measure in identifing non-students or non-faculty.

6.. Our children are just that, our children. We are responsible to insure that they learn to be responsible adults, not pre-pubesent fashionistas, a facsimile of the latest Rap star, or Grunge wannabe.

In summary;
Stutfish's response represents my overall opinion, children must learn responsiblity before individualism, if this were universally imposed drastically different ideas of individuality would be represented, certainly not the Pop Culture clones we all see today at the Mall......

So it Goes........

Texas Wahine

on Nov 10, 2005

singrdave:

Our school in Maryland has no dress code, and that suits us and the kids just fine.

Does it have absolutely NO dress code? Do most children dress appropriately in the absence of a dress code?

We resented having to buy two sets of clothes every school year: one for school and one for home. It got expensive!

I can understand that. For most families who have several children, purchasing uniforms is a greater burden because the younger children usually get a mix of new and hand-me-down clothes for the school year. That doesn't work when you have to have several sets of uniforms in the right size for each child. And as you say, the kids still have to have clothes to play and go out in public in.

Maso:

Having to wear a tie, particularly in the summer months here, is ludicrous and archaic at best. I can't begin to tell you what I would have given to be able to wear what I wanted.

Ugh. Yeah. I understand that uniforms can make the kids look more organized and sharp, but I don't think school uniforms are always called for, and they can make the children uncomfortable which is certainly not conducive to learning.

My dad is a teacher at a last chance type of school. He teaches the roughest kid...gang bangers, drug dealers, violent criminals, etc. His school has a very strict dress code (heck, even the teachers have to wear dress shirts and ties), and I think that in that situation it's necessary. It's best for those kids if they're not wearing gang colors or symbols or showing off the expensive clothes they bought with drug money. It also enforces a certain level of discipline and encourages pride in personal appearance.

The thing is, the kids at his school have done things that justify the removal of the privilege of dressing as they wish. My small children should not be punished for the actions of violent inner city teenagers.

Let the kids have their choice. As you said, it is a great way to empower them and help express their individuality.

In preparing children for adulthood, one of the most important tasks a parent faces is teaching her children decision making skills. Small children do not have many venues in which to exercise these skills. Allowing a child to choose his or her clothing is a safe (meaning the problems caused by a poor choice are not going to have a major impact on the child's life) way to allow them to learn about consequences (i.e., if I wear my favorite sweater on a hot day, I'm going to feel hot and yucky all day).

Gideon MacLeish

on Nov 10, 2005

They tried to pull the "no unnatural hair colors" card on me, but it wasn't anywhere in the rules.

It is NOW. So YOU'RE the one to blame for that one! LOL

Welcome Guest! Please take the time to register with us.
There are many great features available to you once you register, including:

Richer content, access to many features that are disabled for guests like commenting on the forums.
Access to a great community, with a massive database of many, many areas of interest.
Access to contests & subscription offers like exclusive emails.
It's simple, and FREE!