You LIE!!

Published on June 10, 2006 By Texas Wahine In Misc

I don't know if it's because I'm pregnant or what, but I've noticed that people now seem compelled to lie to me to spare my feelings.

I don't particularly mind this, but it would be nice if EVERYONE would lie to me ALWAYS just to keep things consistent, or at the very least, tell convincing lies.

Lie #1: "You're not fat, you're pregnant."

This is very sweet. And for many women this is true. However, if I was fat before I became pregnant, how did I suddenly become not fat and instead just pregnant?

It's a LIE!

Lie #2: Since I got my treadmill, I've been walking twice a day for about a mile each time, at a pretty vigorous pace. I'm not an active person. I don't go around sweaty. I find it icky. So now I get all rosy and drenched in sweat twice a day.

Last night after I finished my mile, I came in all wet and yucky. My husband reached for me and I said, "I'm gross. I stink."

My husband replied, "You never stink." (I would say this is probably a lie since he used the word "never", but I don't *normally* stink, and I think that's what he meant.) He followed that up with, "Try going 7 days in the desert without a shower."

I walked over to him and said, "Here. Smell my neck." My neck was covered in sweat. It was all wet and icky with hairs stuck to it. He buried his face in my wet neck skin and inhaled deeply.

After breathing in my aroma, he said, in a dismissive tone, "You smell like a girl."

LIE!! LIE!! Unless by "like a girl" he meant "gross and smelly", that was a big fat lie.

Lie #3: I got out the bath this morning (after washing off that "like a girl" scent), dried off, did my whole girly routine, got dressed, and came downstairs. I looked around but saw no husband. The bathroom door was open, so there was only one other place he could be.

I opened the garage door and peeked out. Unfortunately, he was in there, and so was my neighbor. Ugh. I stood there, fully dressed, but sans make up and with a towel on my head while she stared back at me, looking like something from a Bratz dolls commercial. Nice slim hips and toned belly. Cute little outfit. Make up and hair perfect. Yuck.

She had come to take back a couch she gave me last year. Now this couch was in the garage, so I'm sure it appeared to her that I didn't want it, but I DO. And plus you shouldn't be an Indian Giver. But whatever.

She called me "Momma". This is my new nickname with everyone in the neighborhood, despite the fact that they all have a million kids too. She asked how I was feeling. Then she told me that I looked smaller and made a hand motion to indicate that my hips were slimmer. Then she added, "Not in your boobs, though!"

Ok, so I have lost a bit of weight. 13 lbs. at first, then I gained 3 back. So I'm down 10 lbs. I've looked all over for where those pounds might have disappeared from and I can't figure it out. I look the same. My belly is bigger, but everything is EXACTLY the same. Where the hell did that weight go away from?!?

All that just to point out that she was LYING!!

And to top it off, when I protested she pulled the "You're not fat, you're pregnant!" card! My husband followed up with, "I tell her that all the time."

LIARS!! All of them. I mean, it's sweet that people want to spare my feelings, but a) don't be so blatant about it (at least make it believable!) and

how come you can't lie to me all nice like that when I'm NOT pregnant?

Grrrr!

And with that, I'm off to get some Cheetos...I mean...some fruit.

Comments (Page 1)

pseudosoldier

on Jun 10, 2006

I've never believed you're fat, kid. Reference the conversation we had in the comments under my last posting.

Additionally, I like the smell of sweaty girl. Sweaty boy is something else entirely.

ParaTed2k

on Jun 10, 2006

Brandie, I don't know what you are worried about. Every pic of you I've seen is different, but I can say in all honesty that I haven't seen one that wasn't flattering to you. Now, I know that it is you who picks the pics you present to the world, so I'm not seeing the full range of you, but if you have that many looks that are good, I'm doubting you can look all that bad.

Remember, you aren't the judge your own hottness. As soon as you decide you are, you lose Hott points.

:::::: and I still say pregnant bellies are sexy ::::::

MasonM

on Jun 10, 2006

Sounds to me like you're just feeling touchy.

Lie #1: "You're not fat, you're pregnant." Ok, if you were in fact fat before getting pregnant, you're probably still fat. But then again, you did state you'd lost some weight too, so this one's a toss up.

Lie #2: Fact is, human sweat doesn't stink. It's bacteria that thrive in that sweat that create an odor, and that takes a bit of time. If you had just finished exercising and were basically clean when you started odds are very good you didn't stink.

Lie #3: You admit you've lost weight even if you don't know from where. This one is plainly you being touchy. Ok, I won't lie to you...bitchy.

Feel better now?

Texas Wahine

on Jun 10, 2006

LOL, 3 replies, ALL men! Hehe.

Pseudosoldier:

I've never believed you're fat, kid. Reference the conversation we had in the comments under my last posting.

I do appreciate that. Nice ego boost.

Additionally, I like the smell of sweaty girl. Sweaty boy is something else entirely.

I totally get that. You know why (I think) that is? Guys usually smell like B.O. when they get all sweaty! Yuck. Hahaha.

ParaTed:

Now, I know that it is you who picks the pics you present to the world,

Hehe. So true! I've always found it interesting when someone posts a really terrible photo of themselves. There's a girl on one of my baby websites that goes by "SEXAY MOMMA" and she put up THE WORST conceivable photo of herself. I know she's gotta be much cuter than that photo (I mean, she's "sexay", right?). Why do that to yourself?

Remember, you aren't the judge your own hottness. As soon as you decide you are, you lose Hott points.

Hahahahhaahaha. I'll keep that in mind!

:::::: and I still say pregnant bellies are sexy ::::::

Aww, that's sweet. I think more men agree than would be willing to admit to it! I am looking forward to having a big 'ol tummy. For some reason, I feel the most secure with myself when I'm great big pregnant!

Mason:

Sounds to me like you're just feeling touchy.

Can I add that this is kind of a facetious post? I mean, thoughts I've actually had, but I'm not sincerely upset, hehe.

Ok, if you were in fact fat before getting pregnant, you're probably still fat. But then again, you did state you'd lost some weight too, so this one's a toss up.

That only works if I was only 10 lbs fat before! Hahahaha.

Fact is, human sweat doesn't stink. It's bacteria that thrive in that sweat that create an odor, and that takes a bit of time. If you had just finished exercising and were basically clean when you started odds are very good you didn't stink.

Hmmm...that's possible. I smell different to me when I sweat, though. I DON'T smell like Glow by JLO when I get off the treadmill! Haha.

You admit you've lost weight even if you don't know from where. This one is plainly you being touchy. Ok, I won't lie to you...bitchy.

Of course. Mostly I'm mad that she took my couch. Hahaha. I had plans to sit on that couch at some point!!

(And I sincerely do think she was lying about my looking smaller, but that's ok, cause she could have said, "Wow. You're getting HUGE!" which would have been far worse! Hehe.)

Feel better now?

MasonM

on Jun 10, 2006

Can I add that this is kind of a facetious post?

Yeah I kinda picked up on that, otherwise I would never have used the word "bitchy" towards a ragingly hormonal pregnant woman.

JillUser

on Jun 10, 2006

Hey, better to get the "you don't look fat you look pregnant" than the "you don't even look pregnant" which means you merely look fat.

You look pregnant and it looks good on you. I bet your hubby genuinely loves everything about you including the smell of your sweat (although I can relate with you on that one).

Believe me, I can relate to being hormonal and touchy. I get people telling me I look great for 30 weeks but can't help but feel like they are just being nice. I agree with the others who have said that they have yet to see an unflattering picture of you.

Texas Wahine

on Jun 10, 2006

Mason:

Yeah I kinda picked up on that, otherwise I would never have used the word "bitchy" towards a ragingly hormonal pregnant woman.

So many of my pet peeves all in one place. LOL.

Jill:

Hey, better to get the "you don't look fat you look pregnant" than the "you don't even look pregnant" which means you merely look fat.

I always hated that. When I was pregnant with Orian it took me a while to show (I was actually in good shape at that point!) and I HATED hearing that I didn't look pregnant.

I'm like, what do you want from me people? Do I need to pin a sonogram pic to my clothes?!?

You look pregnant and it looks good on you. I bet your hubby genuinely loves everything about you including the smell of your sweat (although I can relate with you on that one).

Aww, you're too sweet Jill. Thanks.

I get people telling me I look great for 30 weeks but can't help but feel like they are just being nice.

I haven't seen any recent pics of you, but I remember one Brad posted of you when you were pregnant with your first (I think?). You were in a pumpkin patch. Anyways, you looked lovely. It was the kind of photo that makes other pregnant women envious. Hehe. That's the way I picture you now. I'm sure they're telling you the truth!

I agree with the others who have said that they have yet to see an unflattering picture of you.

Thank you. It's always surprising to get comments like that because I DO NOT feel photogenic. It's rare for me to find a photo of myself that I think is good.

But I think you guys are nice and probably wouldn't dare say, "Wow. Is your nose really that long? And what's up with your eyes in that photo?" Hahaha.

JU is always great for positive feedback and ego boosts!

MasonM

on Jun 10, 2006

It's always surprising to get comments like that because I DO NOT feel photogenic. It's rare for me to find a photo of myself that I think is good.

Typical female.

*running and dodging*

Toblerone

on Jun 10, 2006

Haha this exactly why sometimes it seems easier to skirt around making any sort of comment on a woman's appearance, you're screwed either way. It's the sort of thing that inspire me to write this: Link

Funny article Brandie.

Texas Wahine

on Jun 11, 2006

Mason:

Typical female.

Perhaps. Then again, "I'm not photogenic" is something ugly people say. Hahahahhahaa.

Toblerone:

Haha this exactly why sometimes it seems easier to skirt around making any sort of comment on a woman's appearance, you're screwed either way.

I can't tell you how many times I've heard Adrian complain about that! He says he's going to stop complimenting me. Hehe.

It's the sort of thing that inspire me to write this:

Thanks for the link, I'll check it out.

Funny article Brandie.

Glad you enjoyed it.

crimson

on Jun 11, 2006

Actually, I don't think many people want to say out loud that anyone is fat, unless it's from a souped-up car of teenagers flying by. Being called fat is an insult to most, but a fact of life for many. Fat's not bad, but pointing it out in a way meant to hurt or humiliate is.

As much as I don't want to admit it, no one ever really noticed I was pregnant until the very last month of my pregnancy. It was like I gained twenty pounds in one night and woke up the next morning to see my future darling moving around alarmingly in front of me. I'm only 8 pounds lighter since then! Ha!

And with that, I'm off to get some Cheetos...I mean...some fruit.

Haha. Nice.

terpfan1980

on Jun 11, 2006

That headline is just sooooooo misleading. I was absolutely certain this was gonna be an article about the C.O.L.

And for the record pregnant women don't get fat. Some may glow, but it's definitely not fat.

Tova7

on Jun 11, 2006

In some parts of the country being rude is far worse than being a liar. Especially the "little white lie" variety.

Do you know why I don't tell people they are fat and ugly? Because who am I to do that? What standard do I use? I could be wrong...and then they'd be hurt for no reason. My idea of beauty is not everyone's measuring stick.

I try and find one thing about every person I meet that I can HONESTLY compliment if I'm in the mood to do it. Honestly meaning coming from my heart.

It's all subjective. For example, my cousin's wife is over weight by about 50 pounds but one of the prettiest gals I know....her smile, and dark eyes, my gosh she is gorgeous. I'd kill to have her skin and hair!

She lost ten pounds recently and when I saw her I was flabbergasted. She assured me it was only ten but it looked like much more. I complimented her and told her she looked great. I meant the compliment whole heartedly and also wanted to encourage her because I know she doesn't like to be fat.

She got MAD at me and said, "Geez T, you make it sound like I was a freakin pig before. It was only ten pounds."

HUH?

She looked great before the ten pounds were off and she looks great now. Was I lying? No. I was expressing my opinion.

But you can bet I won't ever compliment her again. Even if she looks so stunning she stops traffic.

All that to say, don't assume people are lying when they say something that you don't agree with or believe.

Of course they could say..."DAMN. How big is your ass now?" Would that make you feel better?

island_gurl12

on Jun 11, 2006

Hehe, I used to hate the white lies but when a friend decided she'd never use them again I reviewed my opinion and it was ok to lie every now and then after all, lol! She was such a mean ass bitch!

And from what I read the ones you're pointing out are not lies! They're just you looking for something to argue about, stop it now! lol

*MWAH* Love ya girl and that aint no lie

Texas Wahine

on Jun 11, 2006

little whip:

Well Brandie, you know you can always count on me to tell you the truth....so here it comes.

You're fat and you stink!

Hahaha. You mean you can smell me all the way in Virginia? Hehe.

Nicky:

Actually, I don't think many people want to say out loud that anyone is fat, unless it's from a souped-up car of teenagers flying by. Being called fat is an insult to most, but a fact of life for many. Fat's not bad, but pointing it out in a way meant to hurt or humiliate is.

This is true. I think it's more people's insistence on saying someone ISN'T fat when it's not really necessary to say anything or at least not necessary to say the complete opposite of the truth just to spare someone's feelings.

I mean, I don't want my husband to tell me constantly that I'm fat. At the same time, if it's obvious to me that I could stand to lose 25 lbs., then saying "you're not fat" is a complete, glaring lie. Maybe a, "Yeah, so you've put on a little weight, but you still look great to me" or "I like how round your butt is now" would be better. Not so much an OBVIOUS lie. Hehe.

As much as I don't want to admit it, no one ever really noticed I was pregnant until the very last month of my pregnancy. It was like I gained twenty pounds in one night and woke up the next morning to see my future darling moving around alarmingly in front of me. I'm only 8 pounds lighter since then! Ha!

You know, that's my big paranoia. Do I just look fat instead of pregnant? Haha. No one's going to tell me the truth. I take a picture each week from the side to see if my tummy's grown because I'm so freaked out about this. Hahahaha.

(That's yesterday, 17 wks...I don't *think* my tummy looked like that before, but JFC, I can never be completely sure, lol. I'm getting seriously neurotic about this.)

And I hear ya about the weight thing, Nicky. I actually lost most of my pregnancy weight with my oldest, and then with my youngest I lost all of it and then some. For years I managed to stay not thin, but "normal" (I guess?). Then this past year after my husband came home from deployment, I just exploded!! I now weigh about what I did when I delivered my other children.

Ah well. Little ones like soft mommies, right? Hehe.

Haha. Nice.

Yeah, I threw some of those bad boys up this morning. I thought I was finished with barfing for this pregnancy.

terpfan:

And for the record pregnant women don't get fat. Some may glow, but it's definitely not fat.

Haha. So can you pinpoint for me the moment that all that fat morphs into "glow"? Does it happen at conception or implantation or later on? Hehe.

Tova:

In some parts of the country being rude is far worse than being a liar. Especially the "little white lie" variety.

I can understand that. Sometimes it's better to just shut up, though, lol.

Do you know why I don't tell people they are fat and ugly? Because who am I to do that? What standard do I use? I could be wrong...and then they'd be hurt for no reason. My idea of beauty is not everyone's measuring stick.

That's a good point. I hadn't thought of that.

I try and find one thing about every person I meet that I can HONESTLY compliment if I'm in the mood to do it. Honestly meaning coming from my heart.

I like doing that, too. I sometimes stop strangers to compliment them, haha. I know that's weird, but it feels so good when someone does that to me, and when I think something nice about someone I like to share it.

She got MAD at me and said, "Geez T, you make it sound like I was a freakin pig before. It was only ten pounds."

Hehe. I can understand her point of view. Like when people tell you that you look "so much better"...it's like, "Thanks, but how bad did I look before?"

But you can bet I won't ever compliment her again. Even if she looks so stunning she stops traffic.

I get that comment from my husband a lot, haahhahaha. He constantly swears he won't compliment me ever again. I guess I need to learn to be more "gracious" and learn how to accept a compliment. But if it seems like bullshit, should I still smile and say thank you?

All that to say, don't assume people are lying when they say something that you don't agree with or believe.

Right. It sometimes seems like it's obvious that they are just saying something to be nice, though.

Of course they could say..."DAMN. How big is your ass now?" Would that make you feel better?

Touché.

islandgurl:

Hehe, I used to hate the white lies but when a friend decided she'd never use them again I reviewed my opinion and it was ok to lie every now and then after all, lol! She was such a mean ass bitch!

Hahahahhahahahahahaha.

And from what I read the ones you're pointing out are not lies! They're just you looking for something to argue about, stop it now! lol

Hehe. I am beginning to think I'm one of those people who needs something to bitch about in order to be happy. Hahahhahaa.

MWAH* Love ya girl and that aint no lie

Aww, thanks. Right back atcha!

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