My youngest child is pretty handy. He can run the vacuum cleaner. He can dress himself. He can run the DVD player. He can make his own ham and cheese sandwich. And today he has learned (well, taught himself) a new skill. I heard him scurrying around in the kitchen . . . rummaging through the pantry . . . I could even hear the sound of his flabby little belly pressed up against the counter. I wasn't sure what he was doing, but I suspected he was busy making himself as sandwich, ...

Every morning I nudge the sleeping boys curled up in my bed and tap their Star Wars underweared butts and say, "It's time to get up boys. C'mon. Let's go get dressed and get some breakfast." I pick the little one up and snuggle him in my arms as the big one runs off to the bathroom. "I'm still sweeping," the little one mutters as he flutters his long dark lashes and opens up his eyes. I rummage through their drawers, or sometimes through the dryer, and find a clean pair of undies and...

BY Orian (4 year old son of Texas Wahine) This time it stopped snowing. And den I wooked out the window and the snow was gone. And den there was no snow and no presents. And I wooked out the window and I saw the snow gone. And den we opened our presents. And there was dark clouds. I had Power Ranger toothpaste in my stocking and it wasn't nasty and it wasn't dumped. And den the earth was dark. And den there was evil guys and they were on the roof. And the Power Rangers were in ...

Stop screaming! Stop fighting! Clean your room! I'm going to put you in the corner! Stop teasing your brother! I can't take the yelling anymore! Stop it, now! *sigh* Save me, Jebus.

I don't have a daughter. Evidently God feels I am the sort of mom who needs only rowdy, grimy little boys. No matter what anyone tries to tell you, boys and girls are inherently different. Give boys dolls and they will tear off the arms and use them as guns. This is just the way it is. Give little girls GI Joes, and suddenly Barbie has a new love interest (shhh . . . don't tell Ken!). This is just the way it is. Some things can't be helped, but some things can. Your second grade...